I heard someone last night talk about making amends is like making an amendment to something, in other words to CHANGE something. It is not enough in this program to just say "I am sorry" and I did this and that, we must change the behavior that caused us to make this amends. Can the father who ignored his children because he drank say I am sorry then continue to ignore them for the program or work or something else? NO! We must say the amends try and heal that wound and CHANGE what we are doing. I am the worst at this. I love to say I am sorry and have no ability to change my behavior. The program is teaching me above all to change. Sometimes, I have heard, when we change the amends make themselves. I am starting my 4th step and am scared and happy at the same time. I hope that in doing this I can make true amends and move past this obsession and compulsion.
Today I am grateful for:
My sunburn being almost gone, now to deal with peeling.